It's been a long time since I last posted an entry and apartment-hunting has taken its toll on me. Glad to say after checking out 10 prospective areas, I've managed to shrink the list down to four: two along the West end, 1 close to Lakeshore and 1 along the East part of the city close to Scarborough. As far as the neighborhoods go, they're pretty much conducive, quiet and family-oriented. The best part is that most of these units accept pre-authorized payment options which makes things a hell of a lot easier when it comes to making payments. It's pretty much TTC accessible whether by bus, street car or train and also very convenient. Banks, laundromats, delis and food stores/shops are close by. I guess I'm pretty lucky considering such places are available for me. Granted they're bachelor pads meaning compacted space, at least I'll have a roof over my head that I could call my own. Then I'll have peace of mind because I'd be able to manage my own household and actually know where my money goes to. I'm really looking forward to a better living situation.
When it comes to making the rent though, I hope I get approved for that. I mean, it's sweet and all that le boyfriend's lending me money for that, which reminds me I have to pay him back in three paycheck's time. Got to make a mental note of that. So, as far as rent goes I'm covered for first and last month. This is really it, I'm doing this. Living on my own. I'm not gonna lie though, the thought scares me a little because I'd have only myself to depend on now but if this is the price I have to pay in exchange for peace of mind, I'd gladly do so without any regrets. Besides, it's time to grow up and be an adult. This is the first step to independence.
To you Mum and whoever else's reading this entry:Whether you know me personally or not, I hope you begin to understand why I've chosen to move out of that living situation. I know I've made many wrong choices in the past which I am not so proud of, but these mistakes have enabled me to grow and fully mature as a person. I know what I want and I know what I should do. Please learn to trust me in whatever I choose to do and whichever direction I choose to take. I'm doing this not only for my sake, but for you as well.I cannot begin to describe what it's like living with him. It's frustrating, stressful and downright infuriating. He cannot support himself. Heck, for the seven months I've stayed in Canada I've been the only one supporting both of us: paying the rent, bills and what have you. I'm tired. I couldn't get the CRNE preparations started because I always ran out of money. He's relied on me so much and it's high time I move out and spread my wings.I love you Mum, but just because I have a Canadian boyfriend, on the process of moving out and getting a place of my own, doesn't mean my priorities have changed. I know what I want, what I have to do to get that and what's best for the family. I'm trying to build a safe and secure environment before May Ann comes here. I don't want her go through what I went through. I want her to live with me. Dad is unfit to live with, cannot support himself and causes unnecessary stress. It isn't a healthy living situation. Trust me in this.There have been a lot of things been going on that you don't know about. There have been times when he would come home dead drunk in the middle of the night, sometimes at dawn and wake me up, fully aware that I have to go to work the following day. He hasn't been paying rent regularly when I give him the money to. Bills haven't been paid and I don't know what's going on with the money I've been giving him. Masyado na siyang dumedepende saken. It's not supposed to be like this Ma.I love you. I'm moving out and I'll let you know as soon as I get settled. I hope you guys understand.
