Monday, April 06, 2009

An Interlude

Snow in April? I woke up today and noticed that the temperature dropped immensely. Looked out and saw that it had in fact snowed earlier this morning, and now it feels like winter again. The funny thing was and I'm quoting him on this one, I was on the phone last night for almost 5 hours with him when he said something like, "Damn you Canadian weather!" LOL. Now I understand the sentiment there. Canada has a crazy and very unpredictable weather pattern situation. I mean, global warming may play a huge part in the climate shift and weather patterns, however, from what I hear it's been like this since time immemorial. It sucks really, because I was finally getting ready to put away my winter clothes in exchange for spring tees and skirts. Oh well. Guess I've to put them away again. Crap, I've to do my banking today and take the bus to work. I'll be freezing my ass off again. Frick.

Oh well, I should get used to all this by now. I mean, if I were to live here [in Canada] for a fairly long time. Well, we'll see. Nothing's etched in stone right? Anyhow, it's Holy Week and out of respect to our Filipino tradition, I would not be posting anything from Good Friday to Black Saturday. I may not be an orthodox Christian, or a devout Catholic but I hold high reverence to the Lenten season. A time to reflect on past misgivings and transgressions.

Speaking of reflection, I've been doing some [deliberation] these past few days [well, a month really] and I've come to this conclusion. Yes, I forgive you Carlo and I hope that whatever lapses in decision I've made in the past with regards to our now defunct relationship will be forgiven. There's neither bitterness nor anger left in me. Not a trace at all. And I mean this from the bottom of my heart, I want you to be happy. And please enough of the trash-talking and spamming, I'm moving on with my life. Please tell your friend to leave me alone. I'm happy where I am now. So stop raining on my parade.

Friday, April 03, 2009

Friday, I'm In Love!

Hell yeah! Friday night baby! One more day of work and then it's weekend movies [with you know who], let's keep our fingers crossed on this one. LOL. Anyhow, today I had a revelation. Yes, in the form of a song from an English rock band [aptly] known as The Cure. I've had an epiphany. I don't love you anymore Carlo. There's not even an ounce of bitterness in me anymore. Not even a trace of regret after every thing that's happened. I'm genuinely happy for you, wherever you may be in your life right now. I hope you find you're own brand of happiness soon as well.

What prompted this revelation you ask? Well I don't know why, but listening to this song made me see things in a different perspective. Like for some reason, I felt through the lyrics and suddenly I knew how I was really feeling about the whole breakup. I thought it would take me months, or heck even years to get on with my life. Somehow though, Robert Smith's vocals spoke volumes of emotions I had towards it all [you and me, the whole breakup]. I'm Cured. LOL.

Moving on, I've noticed something. Everyone at Vox assumes that he and I are together, as in together together? Even the TLs seem to think that way, since for the past few days he's been gone Kam's been asking me about him. LOL. Well, I honestly do not know how to feel about that. But for the benefit of every one who's been visiting this space regularly, no we're not together together. However, we do hang out occasionally and enjoy each other's company. At least, I know I do. And I like things the way they are right now. Slow but sure. Rome wasn't built in day, right? So, here's where I stand in terms of that. 

And to my friends who get to read this post, I hope you guys are happy for me. Keep praying because all of your prayers are doing wonders for me.  To Bam and Nyj, I love you guys so much. Thank you for taking the time to fit me in your busy schedules and standing by me during the darkest hours. To Ate Trace, who's always ready to lend an ear and supplies me daily with words of conventional wisdom, I love you for that. To my Plurk friends, who may not know me personally but have laid witness to my daily drama, thanks guys for putting up with me. To the Vox people, for trying to cheer me on that fateful day, I will never forget that. Lastly, to Aaron, Eric and Amit for humouring me and rallying me through that first week of hell. You guys kept me sane when the world came crashing down on me. I can't thank you enough for that. I guess I am truly blessed to have people like them around me. 
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